35 Comments
  1. Chicksan says

    A lot of “Ernest Goes To Jail” vibes here…….and that makes me smile!

    Edit: You guys are the greatest, thank you for the awards!! The world was a little bit better with Jim Varney in it!!

  2. rinnakan says

    I guess I’ll need a 3rd dose, my 5g chip does not work at all 🙁

  3. bandit69 says

    The problem is that somebody out there, somewhere, will think this is real.

  4. HighOnTacos says

    I’m having a hard time telling what’s actually there and what’s photoshopped on. But I do know that being vaccinated will make me a chick magnet… Or a tongs magnet, vise grip magnet… Maybe not as useful as I thought.

  5. maowoo says

    Ohhh he’s supposed to be magnetic from the vaccine.

    Because the vaccine magnetizes you to allow the 5g to control the nanites.

    Took me forever to get it.

  6. Captain-Shivers says

    Moderna problems require moderna solutions.

  7. fearlesspoet says

    Careful, or you’ll attract Marjorie Taylor Greene.

  8. AnduinIsAZombie says

    It would be so cool if the vaccine turned you into Magneto.

  9. vcwalden says

    I’m a restaurant server, I waited on a customer a few days ago and she appeared to be having a difficult time deciding what to order, I suggested a taco or chef salad, the lady told me she had received both of her vaccine shots and they had altered her taste for certain foods. Prior to receiving the vaccine she loved salads and ate them all of the time. After receiving the vaccine she no longer liked salads, raw and/or cooked vegetables. In fact, she now only likes processed foods that are fried with lots of salt. I told her I had received both of my vaccine shots, they didn’t alter my taste for certain foods, I still liked raw and cooked vegetables nor had I heard of such a side effect. She told me this is a very common side effect, in fact, most people she knew who received the vaccine this happened to. I said I could name at least 200 people I personally knew who got the vaccine and she was the only one I knew with this side effect. She said it was very common, ask my doctor about this, every news program on a daily basis were reporting about this and I was just not being honest with her. She wound up ordering chicken strips, french fries and onion rings.

    I mentioned this conversation to a couple of my co-workers and later on to family and friends and the reaction was a very strange look on their faces followed by a shake of their head and a big laugh. Where do people get a this kind of stuff?

  10. Maxx9393 says

    Did you glue a hammer to your face for the meme?

  11. xaxen8 says

    Yes yes, but tell us…how’s the wifi? Have you gone to [speedtest.net](https://speedtest.net) and figured out your new bandwidth?

  12. Satansflamingfarts says

    Should be tagged NSFW. Op clearly has his nuts out.

  13. sangriya says

    atleast you won’t lose your keys now 🙂

  14. bitemark01 says

    Oh no he’s shedding magnetic fields!

  15. The_FinLanDer says

    Damn, Pfizer didn’t give me this feature. Kinda bummed out now.

  16. radikaltruth says

    It took about 12 hours before I started to feel like shit. Hopefully you don’t. But I wasn’t lucky. The second shot kicked my ass for a full day

  17. atritt94 says

    You trimming your nails at work?

  18. Houmand says

    Man. I’m looking forward to getting 5G too!

  19. AtWSoSibaDwaD says

    Genuinely curious how much of this is practical vs photo editing. Still nice shot.

  20. phantompdx says

    Haven’t been able to remove my wire framed glasses since I got the shot.

  21. torrediruggiero says

    🤣

  22. BittenHand19 says

    Hey did your 5G service get better afterward too? Mine did.

  23. OwlsIsBetterThanMans says

    Aw man you got magnetism?? All I got was the endless compulsion to buy Microsoft products. I think my chip is broken.

  24. moxin84 says

    Juggalo’s are gonna be so confused.

  25. floating_head says

    Getting some Ernest Goes To Prison flashbacks.

  26. KillahHills10304 says

    To watch my coworker tell me the covid vaccine makes you magnetic with a dead serious face and tone was the moment I realized this man will be angry, scared, and confused for the rest of his time on Earth. Lost and churning in a sea of misinformation that never matches what his own senses tell him, driving him to the edge as he keeps going further down the propaganda rabbithole in a doomed attempt to *make it make sense*

  27. GhostalMedia says

    Lucky.
    I didn’t get Magneto’s super powers. All I got was a crappy bandaid and immunity to a deadly pandemic.

  28. Nitemarex says

    Hey i got that same Hohner harp. Neat

  29. Blue_Barry15 says

    I can’t wait for my free wifi!

  30. henryletham says

    This will be upvoted by both the left for the obvious sarcasm and the right for the mistaken seriousness.

    The perfect post.

  31. dicky_seamus_614 says

    Fucking genius!

    How’s that 5G working, full bars?

  32. BABarracus says

    This might be funny if it weren’t for people actually talking this seriously right now.

  33. smooshaykittenface says

    Careful, an impressionable boomer might see this and use it as reason to crap on covid vaccine

  34. wtfastro says

    Can you taste the five G’s?

  35. reap3rx says

    I just started hearing about this next gen crazy conspiracy theory today. It’s amazing, and very scary, how quickly this shit spreads. It’s not like we don’t have to worry about 20-30% of the population believing it to be absolute fact now, either.

    I remember back when I was in high school and the internet was still relatively new that I thought human intelligence would soar I’m the age of the internet. Turns out we are really seeing how that definitely isn’t going to be the case.

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